Worth It.
Keep reminding myself that this is all worth it. That I’ve attained the goal of getting my fellowship, and therefore am one step closer to doing the study I’ve dreamed about doing. The painful learning curve stretching the bounds of my mind and pushing my tolerance for sleeplessness will add up to preparation for doing a better study in Spain. The harder I work now preparing these orals, linking the areas together, writing and drawing connections between ideas and areas of scholarship, the better prepared I’ll be for doing a good quality study.
Funny how we can usually go much further than we think we can. I find I’m ready to give in, throw in the towel for the night, just get some sleep, but then push forward and sometimes even do the best work of the day after midnight. It makes me think of marathon runners, mountain climbers, of young parents, of people fighting illnesses–small and large ways life tests us, and if we can find a way to push past that wave of exhaustion or loss of confidence, the growth comes.
Listening to shouts of the Mission as I write this, Saturday night revelers whose laughs bring to mind lighter, less work-centered times. In a little more than a month it will be time to revel a bit myself. Just need to push a little bit more.
How do you motivate or push yourself when you hit a wall with academic work? How about with other pursuits? What keeps you going?
May 1st, 2009 at 11:20 am
Hooray – well said! What gets me through is often just the dim and stubborn hope for some future reprieve 😉 But your right – it’s always when we dig deeper that the best thinking/writing/living happens. Hang in there – it’s all worth it. xo